The Dubliner Magazine: The Best of Dublin 2008

Entertainment & Fun

Pub crawls, pole dancing, popping the question... We’ve thrown a bit of everything into this section. There is so much fun to be had in this old town, sober or otherwise; you just need to know where to look. Here are some (practical, bizarre, random) suggestions from our intrepid team. Reclaim this city... today

Partylimobynight3 Novelty Party
The Party Limo
20 Lower Stephen Street, Dublin 2. 475 3313,
www.creativeevents.ie

Groove on the move! This sleek black coach with built-in bar cruises around town, letting you and your pals jump in and out for a rigorous pub-crawl. To avoid the usual group indecisiveness, work out the itinerary with the company beforehand. They’ll pre-book the bars and include club cover-fees in your price while dropping you door-to-door. Expect onboard drinks, a pumping sound system and finger-food for well-needed soakage. Creative Events also does the Cube – same concept, but with live music. Holds 35/40 drunks at any given time for standard packages ranging from €40 per head. They’ll also go ‘down the country.’ Hen party heaven. CH

002808681 Season Ticket
Leinster Rugby
55 Main Street, Donnybrook, Dublin 4. 269 3224,
www.leinsterrugby.ie

What do Nick Hornby, Jack Nicholson and Condoleezza Rice have in common? They’re fanatical season ticket holders for their local team (Arsenal, the LA Lakers and the Cleveland Browns). There’s nothing like nailing your colours to the mast. Don the blue, white and gold of Leinster – and support the Magners league-winning team. A season ticket guarantees your seat, of course, but also gives you: entry into a draw for the hen’s teeth of rugby (home international tickets); access to member events; discounted merchandise; booze (O’Brien’s); food (Wagamama) and clothes (Best Menswear). Finally, you also get that warm, intangible sense of belonging that you get from being an official supporter. EF

Bijou Cinema
Denzille Lane
13 Denzille Lane, Dublin 2. 661 1422, www.denzillecinema.com

Why queue for popcorn in the Omniplex when you can sip champagne in your own private cinema? Situated just off Merrion Square, this boutique picturehouse is a chic alternative to suffering spotty teens sucking face and idiots talking on their mobile phones. Book the space for up to 30 people and they’ll throw in canapés, bubbly and use of the in-house bar. AOC

Roughing it Pub
The Ferryman
35 Sir John Rogerson’s Quay, Dublin 2. 671 7053

Back when the Docklands was a no-go area, this place was its no-go pub. The consistent smell of Dettol masked, I thought, something altogether darker. Now, of course, any whiff of disinfectant is masked by the communal crush of office workers from 3pm, creating a scene ripe for sociologists and satirists. The few hard-bitten locals who haven’t emigrated up to the Padraig Pearse watch in bemusement while ad execs and solicitors get as drunk as champers-swigging swine. The atmosphere (still somewhat rough and ready) even has a de-gentrifying effect on the accountants. Mayhem prevails by 10pm. Hooray! DO

Internet Café
Central Cybercafé
6, Grafton Street, Dublin 2. 677 8298, www.globalcafe.ie

Any asshole with a computer and a kettle can call his home a cybercafé. But if you want a bit of comfort and computers free of the plague, Central Cybercafé is your safest bet. It’s rather pricey (€1.50 for 20 minutes!), but the location (above Bus Stop on Grafton Street) and the computers (fully equipped with scanners, web cams, CD burners and flatscreen monitors) are adequate compensation. Plus, you can avail of the latest cha craze, Taiwanese Bubble Tea – it’s a Cosmo for the caffeine set. We also like the cushy leather armchairs, just one evolutionary step short of the La-Z-Boy. There’s another branch on O’Connell Street, but it’s not as much fun. CK

Pull a Banker
Lagoona Bar
Unit 4, Custom House Square,
IFSC, Dublin 1. 791 8928,
www.thesmithgroup.ie

If talk of securities and six-figure bonuses gets you hot under the collar, hedge your bets and head to Lagoona bar. This IFSC watering hole in Custom House Square is the perfect place to snag a suit. Surrounded on three sides by the world’s biggest financial institutions, it’s a veritable pulling peninsula. But don’t hover at the bar. Footie on the big screens is just too much of a distraction. Best to rub shoulders outside, where most post-deal pints are had. AOC

Botanic7703 Urban Refuge
National Botanic Gardens
Glasnevin, Dublin 9. 804 0300, www.botanicgardens.ie

Mid-July, and the herbaceous walk in the Botanic Gardens has reached a zenith of colour and noise. Bring earplugs. The buzzing of bees in the Herbaceous Border walk exceeds the noise level in a small airport. The border flowers grow in an organised riot. Watch out for the silvery sculptured thistles that look so fierce and elegant. Eucryphias are small trees or shrubs, with stunning white flowers in July. There’s a great specimen on the front lawn to the right.

Romneya culteri – six feet high Tree Poppies – are a must: double-frilled papery flowers are centred with clumps of huge stamens, and they smell gorgeous. They are in the Family Beds – turn left just past the Tea Rooms.

The tall Palm House has been refurbished and now includes a tiny thatched hut. One wall glows with electric pink Bouganvillea, as well as other less people-friendly plants. Kevin Kenny, a polymath of riveting conversation, pointed them out to me insouciantly: “Chew this one and you have 20 minutes of life left, and this one does for you in 15 minutes.” He also used the bamboos for a dissertation on the Fibonacci sequence as applied to music, and to bamboos on which he played me a little melody.
Set in a step I spotted the plaque in honour of Viennese philosopher Ludwig Wittgenstein, who used to sit there and write during the winter of 1948/1949. And I recognised the reason: when I was young and poor and cold I too used to bring my lunch there, the only place I could get warm, on winter weekends. HLB

Pull a Foreigner
Cafe En Seine
39 Dawson Street, Dublin 2. 677 4567,
www.capitalbars.com

If you like foreign people, business people, or foreign business people, go to Café en Seine. It attracts an inordinate number of Italians, Spaniards and Eastern Europeans. Presumably it is the décor – that Art Deco Parisian look, with large pillars and gilt mirrors all around. Beware: the false opulence of the surroundings belies the sleaziness of some customers. CG

Audio Book Club
arts & disability ireland
10-11 South Earl Street, Dublin 8. 473 6600, www.adiarts.ie

Imagine if Joanna Lumley dropped by to read Pride and Prejudice in that fabulously cultured voice...or Bill Clinton shared his memoirs in his sexy Southern drawl. Audio books may never replace their paper counterparts but they have advantages – ever tried driving and reading? Ireland’s first integrated (fully sighted and visually impaired members) audio book club meets every couple of months and the banter is lively – everyone loved Q&A but most hated Soul Music. New members are very welcome. EF

Church Place To Get Married
Newman University Church
87 St Stephen’s Green, Dublin 2. 478 0616

This tardis-like building is a paradox. Pedestrians pass the tiny, unimposing façade without even glancing at it, never guessing that it hides such a splendid interior. After fruitless attempts to purchase a plot suitable for his magnificent university church, John Henry Newman was forced to build it in the back garden of a modest brick house on the Green. Step beyond the unexceptional porch into a beautifully ornate 100-foot long Byzantine-style basilica vibrant with colour. The stunning marbles were sourced countrywide; red from Cork, grey and brown from Offaly and Armagh, black from Kilkenny and green from Connemara. This stunning church is fantastically located for a wedding – stroll across to the Green for photos and then perhaps on to the Shelbourne. This 500-seater can easily accommodate even the most popular couple. EF

Bones!
St Michan’s
Church Street, Dublin 7

Dem bones are a spine-chilling treat. You’ll find them in the basement of St Michan’s church, near the Four Courts on the north bank of the Liffey. The original church dated back to the 11th Century and came courtesy of Viking settlers, but was rebuilt in the 17th Century for upwardly-mobile Dubs. The organ was played by Handel when he was dreaming up the Messiah. But the best thing is the mummified remains in the crypt, which include a crusader with a missing finger. Wolfe Tone’s death mask is there too, plus some perfectly-preserved cadavers. Why didn’t the corpses rot? Some say methane, some say magnesium, but we think these guys are just party people who don’t know how to quit. To see the bones you have to shimmy down through a trap-door on the outside of the building and then proceed along a subterranean corridor. Not for the claustrophobic, then... but very cool. AL

Student Bar
Doyle’s
8/9 College Street, Dublin 2. 671 0616, www.doylesintown.com

Doyle’s has a late bar licence and a DJ most nights (don’t go on a Sunday or Monday – it’s dead). Add in its proximity to Trinity, reasonable drink prices and a laid-back vibe, and what do you get? Lots of bloody students. It’s set over three levels, so you can nearly always find a seat, particularly in the downstairs bar. The music upstairs is pretty good; if, that is, you like indie with some classic rock and punk thrown in. CG

Hipster Pub
The Bernard Shaw
11-12 South Richmond Street, Dublin 2. 085 712 8342, www.bodytonicmusic.com

Is it a pub? Is it a gallery? Is it a car boot sale? No, it’s just the BS. This 113-year-old pub – which reopened in 2006 – is a proxy home for Dublin’s hipster community. With no Shoreditch to call their own, there’s now a hybrid fun-house for anyone with a fetish for porkpie hats and skinny jeans. Two bars, three rooms and a nifty beer garden (read: yard with a pool table) set the scene with music six nights a week and Buckfast by the pitcher (€12). Check out the Saturday Toe Jam sessions, including film exhibitions, Pro-Evo competitions and, er...badge-making. If you’re hungry, the bar takes orders for Ray’s Pizza around the corner. They’ll even throw in some beer with your 12”. Now who said Dublin was soulless? AOC

Fireside Cocktail
Trocadero
4 St Andrew’s Street, Dublin 2. 677 5545, www.trocadero.ie

The Troc is like our very own Sardi’s, with photographs of stars lining the walls. And the plush, deep red furnishings have seen us through thick and thin, never wishing to change with the times, thank God. This is one of the few restaurants that treads a line between tourist trail and off-the-wagon trail. You don’t necessarily come for the food (though we do love the cannelloni). Robert Doggett and his crew will take care of you. The Troc’s side door will lead you to the cocktail bar and open fire, which has just two precious seats beside it. Wait for the rowdy actors to file in after their show. That’s when things really heat up. QF

New Music Venue
The Academy
57 Middle Abbey Street, Dublin 1.
877 9999, www.theacademydublin.com

Remember Spirit? The home of Polish men with their tops off and fake-tanned hotties in skirts that would make your mum blush? Then there was HQ, of course, and before that the Hot Press Hall of Fame. They all seemed like good ideas at the time. Now 57 Middle Abbey Street is home to The Academy. Still in the hands of MCD, it’s primarily a music venue and it’s really starting to come in to its own. The stage in the main venue is quite low, giving the room an intimate feel, and the sound system is impressive. We like the Green Room bar downstairs and there’s also an upstairs bar usually reserved for the VIPs. Many excellent acts have played there since it opened in January – Foals, Peter Hook from New Order, CSS, the Zutons – and there are some good ones coming up: British Sea Power, Delorentos, Jose Gonzalez, the Levellers. CG

Writing Group
Dublin Libraries
085 160 9906, www.dublincity.ie

If talking’s not your buzz, maybe you’d prefer writing? Informal writers groups meet either weekly or monthly, depending on demand, in Kevin Street, Cabra, Coolock and Donaghmede libraries. The organiser of the former two, Orla Ní hAonigh, insists that the atmosphere is “friendly and relaxed. Very relaxed.” To begin, anyone who has written a piece in the previous week reads it for the group. After that, Orla sets them an excercise. “Every week,” she says, “is a different adventure.” CP

People Watching
Starbucks @ BT2
28-29 Grafton Street, Dublin 2.
605 6666. www.starbucks.com

A sociology student just told me that, as part of a class assignment on behavioural habits, a group of them spent the afternoon peering out the windows of Starbucks on the first floor of BT2. Finding it is tricky – navigate your way through the racks of funky gear through to the horrendously expensive children’s section where the café is located. Once there, if you’re lucky enough to grab a seat, you have a panoramic view of Grafton Street, where you can amuse yourself for hours. A voyeur’s paradise. CG

Place to Pose
The Casting Couch
No 3, Fitzwilliam Square, Dublin 2.
661 7066, www.thecastingcouch.ie

It’s a sorry day when you get laughed off Bebo for not having a professional headshot but hey, these are the times in which we live. If you do need to work your angles, the Casting Couch is by far your best option. Open for photography, film and model sessions, the Couch is a laid- back, intimate space rather than your standard studio fare. Manager Genevieve MacKenzie gets the balance just right. White leather couches, flowers and a fully- stocked kitchen set the tone along with a full camera kit, choice of backdrops and your very own assistant. Hire it by the hour, half day or day and have your own Tyra moment. Fabulous! AOC

Eco Hang-out
Cultivate
15-19 Essex Street West, Temple Bar, Dublin 2.
674 5773, www.cultivate.ie

If you feel you’re not doing enough to help the environment, head down to the Cultivate Centre at the quiet end of Temple Bar. They run regular events aimed at educating the public about sustainable living and there is an eco shop which sells natural paint, solar-powered iPod chargers, garden supplies and even cardboard doll’s houses. Keep an eye out for the tumblers refashioned out of old wine and beer bottles. A great place to visit on a lazy Saturday afternoon, and it will help your karma no end. CG

Learn to Céilí
The Glenside
Landscape Road, Churchtown, Dublin 14.
298 5932, www.setdancing.com

Where better to learn a set than above a local pub with a thatched roof? Old ‘Oirish’ references aside, Irish dancing is almost cool again. At this weekly meet in Churchtown – beginners can come Tuesdays from 8-10pm – you’ll work those calf and butt muscles hard. Yes, it’ll hurt at first but soon you’ll be looking like J-Lo. And if you have post-traumatic-Salsa class disorder, fear not. These are not the vindictive teachers of old Ruddy fame. Here, you’re actually encouraged to make the dance ‘your own’. Brave words. To use a painful cliché – ’tis mighty. CH

Pole Dance
Down Under
South King Street, Dublin 2.
478 3266, www.majortoms.com

When nighttime revellers – ladies in particular – see a pole in a nightclub, they start with the sarcastic comments. A few drinks in, they glance at it longingly. Many drinks in, they become entirely mesmerised by it, drawn like moths to a metallic flame. This is when the problems start. Pole dancing is much harder than it looks, and requires a lot of upper body strength. Unfortunately for them – but fortunately for us – the tipsy ladies don’t get this. They think they look sexy as they swing vacantly round and round, mistaking the shouts and laughter for encouragement. This is very, very entertaining for everyone else. Go to Down Under of a Saturday night and see the spectacle for yourself. CG

Ukiyo_4 Disco Dancin’
Ukiyo
7-9 Exchequer Street, Dublin 2.
633 4071, www.ukiyobar.com

Okay, it’s a school night, but it may be just worth the Monday morning pain for this one. Sundays have turned into a surprise hit for Ukiyo: think late-1970s New York á la Studio 54...but in Dublin. This is disco with just the right amount of mirrorball. It’s all about big anthems that are familiar but still manage to steer well clear of the Bee Gees. If you can steam your way to the bar you’ll find a good range of cocktails and beers, and champagne flows at a hedonistic rate. Or you can just hang out and get your groove on, as long as you don’t mind someone else getting theirs on squashed against you. No room for handbags on this dancefloor: just like Studio 54, more people are turned away than let in, so get down (on it) early. JC

(Better) Spire
Killiney Obelisk
At the top of Killiney Hill, County Dublin

Long before the Stiletto in the Ghetto, aka the Prick in the Thick of It, SoCoDu had its very own Spire. The Obelisk on Killiney Hill, proudly pointing at the sky over the sea on Dalkey’s coastline, has just been restored. It was built by John Malpas in the 1740s as a famine relief project; it was a folly, and is as glorious as these eccentric structures are all over ‘these islands’. The setting is a good-to-be-alive scenario: Wicklow mountains to the south, Dalkey Island to the north, Dublin city to the west and the Irish Sea to the east. Breathe deep. AL

Fun with Balls
Jugglin’ Dublin
7 Crow Street Bazaar, Temple Bar, Dublin 2. www.jugglindublin.ie

Richard Kane is a short, skinny, smiley guy who does juggling and circus acts. Because he couldn’t find the special equipment he needed in Dublin, he opened his own shop in Temple Bar. “I always wanted to live in a house full of toys,” says Kane. “Now, I have my own toy shop.” Come for balls, clubs, diabolo, devilsticks, facepaint, frisbees, hula hoops, poi, rings, stilts, yoyos. Once you get the basics down, you can join his Fair Play Juggle Group, which meets once a week at the Lab on Foley Street, or, during the summer months, in Merrion Square on a Tuesday evening. “It’s like being backstage at the circus,” says the ringmaster. CP

Go Foreign
Language Exchange
www.dublincity.ie

Many of Dublin’s public libraries offer free ‘conversation exchanges’ in the evenings. There’s no teacher or class structure as such – people just come in when they want, sit with those with whom they want to chat, and get on with it. Couldn’t be more flexible. Each night is based around a particular language which is ‘exchanged’ with English. The most popular are the Italian, Spanish and German nights – they attract up to 70 people in the Ilac Library. There are also Russian, Japanese, Chinese, Polish and Irish nights. The good thing is that it’s not about being the best, it’s about helping one other. It’s also a nice way to make friends, and we’re assured by the organisers that love has blossomed on more than one occasion. CP

Free Show - Art Auctions
Whyte’s
38 Molesworth Street,
Dublin 2. 676 2888, www.whytes.ie

James Adam & Sons
26 St Stephen’s Green, Dublin 2.
676 0261, www.jamesadam.ie

Now that the country is going bust again, it’s fun watching the Celtic Tiger generation go on a spending spree before they go into liquidation. Buying art is how Dublin’s property developers, accountants and lawyers prove that they have class as well as brass. John De Vere White has a witty sales patter, and Ian Whyte runs the most user-friendly art auctions, but if you want to gasp aloud as overpaid stockbrokers or the last of the Protestant gentry pay six-figure sums for mediocre paintings by over-hyped artists, then Adam’s on the Green is the venue. Go to the sale just before Christmas, when some buyers have a few drinks on board. In 2006, a collection of Norah McGuinness oil paintings sold for €350,000, triple its estimated value. Entry is free, the paintings certainly aren’t. JB

Gig Guide
phantom 105.2
888 5151, www.phantom.ie

Phantom rocks! In a world of bland, talk-just-to-fill-the-silence radio it’s refreshing to hear something original and characteristic of our newly vibrant city. There was a time when no self-respecting band included Dublin on their tour itinerary but now we’re hip and cool - household names are flocking here in droves. Even the homegrown talent is terrific with bands like Ham Sandwich and Future Kings of Spain flying the flag. But you can’t go if you don’t know and that’s where Phantom listeners have the edge – the station is often first to announce gigs and they helpfully play a snippet from the band in question too. Without them we would never have discovered the wonderful Tokyo Police Club or known that the Manic Street Preachers were prepared to slum it in the Ambassador. EF

Picnic Spot
Ashtown Castle
Phoenix Park, Dublin 8. 677 0095

When the Papal Nuncio moved out of Ashtown Lodge in 1978, the building was riddled with dry rot and the Corporation condemned it. An astonished demolition crew was flabbergasted when the dust settled and there in the rubble, stood a small castle, obviously once incorporated into the old lodge and forgotten about. This marvellous little gem may date from the 1430s, as its dimensions conform to a law passed by Henry VI offering £10 to any citizen who built a castle for their own safety. Now beautifully restored, it forms part of the impressive Phoenix Park Visitor Centre and the OPW has thoughtfully placed picnic tables all around it. Bring along a packed lunch and ignore the rain (Irish people are waterproof for goodness sake). EF

Piano Teacher

Liza Hingerty
Waltons School of Music, 69 South Georges Street, Dublin 2.
475 0661, www.waltons.ie

“I am tone deaf.”
“No one is tone deaf,” said Liza Hingerty.
“No really,” I assured her. “I actually am tone deaf.”
Six weeks later I was bashing out the first few notes of Beethoven’s ‘Ode to Joy’. With no great rhythm or style, but bashing out nonetheless. Liza Hingerty, who gives group and solo lessons at Walton’s, is a woman of considerable patience and she deserves this award for enduring my company for over three months. Plus: she is also a very accomplished singer whose gigs at venues such as Bleu Note and Cassidy’s are a lot of fun. Don’t expect Liza to turn you into a Daniel Barenboim. But do go along with an open heart (and, if necessary, a deaf ear). You’ll be impressed. TW

Roof Terrace
Fitzsimons
21-22 Wellington Quay, Temple Bar, Dublin 2.
677 9315, www.fitzsimonshotel.com

Fitzsimons in Temple Bar is full of tourists and tall rugby boys on the pull. But the roof terrace! It’s the best smoking area in the city and a great place to enjoy the sun. You don’t go for the view – the wall is pretty high up here on the fifth floor. But that blue sky is all yours. There are couches and tables (avec sunshades), and a small bar which is slightly more expensive than downstairs. Gets mucho crowded of a clear evening, but it’s quiet during the afternoon. CP